cousin

Moving into a new place.
Wheather? cold and windy.
Uni starts soon and everyone is juz waiting to get bck to their studies.
Roomates are new and the room was kinda crowded but cosy.
Decided to walk around. The place seems new to me yet familiar.
Walked aimlessly hoping for something to happen.
Next thing i knew it, B(from the states) was at the store. I didn't think it was him but it was. My long lost cousin. The cousin I haven seen for more then 10 years. He saw me and said it was actually a suprise. We hugged and kissed. I was juz happy to see him again. We chatted quite alot online and he's a cool american boy =)
We walked around the city and ppl seem to be noticing us. Most of them thinking we're a couple considering he's not even blood related(family related only) so that could be possible.
One funny thing was i felt weird. We seem like close frens as if we've known each other all our lifes. Felt like I've been seeing him for a long time. Felt strange.
I didn't wanna think other wise but there was something in his eyes that said differently. Something I hate seeing but have been seeing it all the time almost whoever I meet(guys in general).
Now I wonder....
.... and I hope not

un-updated (tis is no dream)

Haven actually been writing much about dreams. Been too busy.
Although most seem to come to life. About the fact that 3 guys fight for me(2 years ago dream), i think it means what is happening in front of me though it's not a physical fight. Glad it's not a huge, realisation fight though ;)
Senses are most the time true.
It's like knowing something and sensing the next move.
I've got quite sharp reflexes. But sometimes ppl just don't know I realise things. Most the time I act like I dunno whats happening or dunno whats going on but then again there are time when I really haven't the clue on whats going on.
Dreams?
They do come true. That's for my case.
So far most the time I get at least 5hours of sleep if lucky 8-9hours. So I don't actually remember my dreams once I wake up.
Hopefully I can get sleep once I reach home. I can still remember the heavenly feeling on my 1st night here. I sleep so peacefully I felt the happy happenings of the future in Sydney.

life..

The dreams I have been having seems so clear.
I stare deeply into the situation in amazement and frightfulness.
Now much longer am I to live this curse.
Reliving the day...
And going through the same nightmare,
the same worriness and pain.

Afraid to write my dream.
No time to mention the happenings.
Can't seem to find the words.
Can't seem to find my way.

Afraid. So afraid yet trying to be brave.
Acting brave yet tremble with fright.
Being a mask to myself.
It's a miracle ppl see through me.

I'm an actor,
I'm 2 person...
I don't know which is real anymore.
I dunno which is my true self...